2008 February | the argot of an eidolon

freak marriage

Here I was sitting in the bride’s waiting room amidst of hub-bub of wedding prepartion, or should I say, ARRANGED marriage prepartion and all I can feel was ridicule. And my groom? One of my high school friends called ‘yam lou’! (One may, at this point, wonder at the wisdom of my parents in picking me a lifetime partner for me who held such a nick!)

It was a gloomy day indeed.

Needless to say my face was as dark as charcoal. Darker, actually. A slight comfort (or not) was that the groom was equally as unhappy as I were. At this age and era when people has abundant choice to choose their status, sexuality, nationality and even babies’ sex, can somebody tell me why do I have to go through this?

Am I that pathetic that I need an arranged marriage? Seriously?

To add salt to the wound, I don’t even have a proper wedding dress! Nor was the banquet tables properly set! (event organizer gene’s kicked in instantly) Nor do I have bridesmaids! Nor do I want to have my wedding in a Chinese restaurant! Nor is the air-conditioning cold enough! (ok, this is just plain bullshit) Nor is the groom the one I want to spend the rest of my life with! *No offense ok, yamlou.

And then I jerked awake, sweating and swearing.

And then after 2 days realized that, it may just be a sympton of me not overcoming the deep unease that my mum put on me that day when she said that one of my dad’s friend’s son and me are actually quite a match yet.

Shucks, mum, thanks. I’m scarred for life now.

talking about love-box

Reading SlowCatchUpKwan’s most recent blog entry “Condom Without Embarassment” reminds me of a recent incident during my stay in Singapore for training.

One fine night after work, I was at 7-11 with my female colleague getting some goods when we chanced upon this cute little love-box that is soooo cute that you will fell like getting one immediately.

So it was when I was holding the love boxes standing in front of the cashier, my two MALE colleagues suddenly appeared beside me! Walaoehh… Talk about embarassing encounter! I stuttered greetings and was trying my best to hid away the boxes while they were surrepticiously trying to get a good look at what I’m purchasing.

Oh yeah, on the other hand, I was also holding on to a mega-size condom (allegedly tested by African elephant) which I plan to use at my friend’s hen’s night. It’s a party trick ok, a party trick. I don’t think any living human can fit into that condom!

Imagine… I was only 1 week+ into my new job and now this… I swear I got them because they look so adorable. You know you can actually use them as pill boxes… *yeah, whatever

Best thing is, 2 weeks after, one of the male colleagues actually asked me during a phone conversation “So what happened to the love boxes you bought the other day?” *sweat

Gong Xi Fa Cai!

This year must be one of the most boring Chinese New Year I’ve ever had. Apart from the lack of enthusiasm felt from all corners of Malaysia (my friends in Seremban, Penang, Muar, Perak, KL as well as Singapore all told me the same thing), it is my definite bad fortune that I fell SICK during this most joyous time of the whole year.

I was so looking forward to having a drunk fest during CNY… Alas, it was not to be. As it is, the famous B151 (all the way from Australia) is still sitting patiently on my dresser waiting for me to finish it up. Sad, very sad.

Anyway, the MAJOR achievements I did this CNY were:

1) got my bro to wear the SAME t-shirts (in M, L, XL respectively from oldest to youngest, from left to right) and manage to bully them in taking a picture!

Note: All their smiles were FORCED. By me of course.

PS: Don’t you think they look 0h-so-adorable especially with the golden rat?

2) manage to corner all my uncles, aunties, cousins and my delicate grandma to take pictures! After several snaps from my camera I suddenly found everyone whipping out their cameras to do the same… *sweat*

Note: My beautiful girl cousins. All younger. No, they are not available!

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